Hello Corina,

Again, thanks for responding to my response! Very well explained and thought out. I also thought of Michael Peña’s character in Ant-Man… and man, it’s super tricky to incorporate characters appropriately that fit certain stereotypes. I hope to develop the Jedo and Carlos characters more just like you said… and I think you’re right… I’m going to have to rework things in the intro and in the conversation Dexter and the Jedo have at the beginning.

I want Jedo to be almost like a “father figure” for Dexter (seeing as his father died), and the way it stands in the demo, the player just doesn’t get that impression.

Thank you so much for your constructive criticism. It’s duly noted and honestly, it’s had a profound impact on my thoughts the last couple of days. It’s all for the better! I hope to make a story that sticks with people, helps them appreciate friendship and gives the a sense of adventure.

Thanks!

– Jeremy

Hey there, Jeremy!

Glad you got a chance to go over my review! I think the game looks really superb, which why I was so caught off-guard by Jedo and Carlos. Now that it’s been explained to me, I totally get what you were going for, but since it needed an explanation, the characters may require some further tweaking. Stereotypes are really hard to work with, but I do think it can be done. Playing with/calling out the audience’s expectations is one way to handle it (for example, Michael Pena’s Luis from Ant-Man, though some people might disagree with my assessment). With more time to develop or a different introduction, Jedo and Carlos could still work; they just need more depth, something that makes them people and not just jokes, you know?

I really am looking forward to seeing more from you and your game. Looks like it’s gonna be rad.

I posted the below comments on “foehammer’s” youtube video – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BjPgvkkXMyQ but now I see that the comments in his video description were actually from this article. Whoops!

Anywho, here goes… copy…. and… paste…

“Thanks so much for playing through my game. I also, want to thank you for your insight. Apart from my friends who have helped act in the game, the only other person who has seen it is my wife (and now the people who downloaded it). It’s awesome to get feedback and hear the things that you like, don’t like or the things you think could be improved. I appreciate all of it.

The part about Gabriela not having any good lines and not portraying female characters well, is something I agree with. I realized this while I was programming her part, but because my buddy that plays Dexter lives on the other side of the country, I wasn’t able to pull him in for any additional voice acting. So, I couldn’t really fix the faux pas I made with her in the demo.

The full game will definitely see some re-writes and additions. In fact, Aurora, the main female protagonist in the story, will have a big role in solving puzzles. And the “damsel in distress” trope will not happen in this game. Dexter will NOT have to rescue her, in fact, it may just be the other way around. Then why did Aurora say “I need Dexter Stardust” at the beginning of the game? In the full game you’ll see that Aurora was not moved by fear to call Dexter to help her, but because they made such a good team in the past, that she felt Dexter, despite being her ex, is still the best person to go on an adventure with. I hope to make Aurora and Dexter simultaneously playable once they enter the hollow moon.

On another note, Dexter and Aurora, are both played by Latino actors, Mexican and Dominican respectively. The actor who plays Dexter also plays the Jedo and Carlos in the game (kind of a Monty Python thing going on). In fact, he created the Jedo character, as a parody of the Jedi in Star Wars (although I may take out “la fuerza” references just to keep it a bit more original). I myself, although being American and Caucasian, speak Spanish and I lived in the Dominican Republic for almost 9 years. If there’s anything I’ve learned, it’s that in all cultures we range from “normal” (quote – unquote) to ridiculous. Due to my association with Latino people, and the lack of strong front and center Latino protagonists in film and games (they are usually reduced to side characters), I wanted to feature my talented Latino friends in this game. Dexter and Aurora, who are Latino in the game (Spanish speaking countries also colonize space in the future), play one end of the social spectrum, and the Jedo, plays the more ridiculous, silly end of the social spectrum.

The kickstarter hasn’t happened quite yet because I want to get the game out there a bit more. And I should be doing a Steam Greenlight shortly.

Thanks for the review, the insight and the criticism. I’ll be thinking about these things as I develop the game further.”

Awesome review guys. I’ll let you know of any updates regarding the game.

– Jeremy